Let love in
by noideagirl
Summary: LJ - Lily needs to learn to let love in. With the help of James maybe she will. From the fight with Snape onwards
1. The beginning

Disclaimer: If I were J., would I be uploading this in a genetics lecture? No.

The beginning of the story is a rewrite from Snapes worst memory.

* * *

It was exam time. There were more than a hundred of smaller tables, all facing the same way, at each of which sat a student, head bent low, scribbling on a roll of parchment. The only sound was the scratching of quills and the occasional rustle as somebody adjusted their parchment.

Sunshine was streaming through the high windows on to the bent heads, which shone chestnut and copper and gold in the bright light.

'Five more minutes!'

She saw the top of Professor Flitwick's head moving between the desks a short distance away.

She'd finished the exam, her paper nicely titled in big letters: DEFENCE AGAINST THE DARK ARTS - ORDINARY WIZARDING LEVEL.

She looked over to where James was sitting, fascinated with the boy, even though he drove her insane.

James yawned hugely and rumpled up his hair, making it even messier than it had been. Then, with a glance towards Professor Flitwick, he turned in his seat and grinned at a boy sitting four seats behind him. It was his best friend, Sirius Black. They were practically inseperable. She knew that if you wanted one, you'd have to accept the other. A smile crossed her lips as she contemplated that depth of friendship. Even she and Alice weren't that close.

'Quills down please!' squeaked Professor Flitwick. 'That means you too, Stebbins! Please remain seated while I collect your parchment! Accio!'

Over a hundred rolls of parchment zoomed into the air and into Professor Flitwick's outstretched arms, knocking him backwards off his feet. Several people laughed. A couple of students at the front desks got up, took hold of Professor Flitwick beneath the elbows and lifted him back onto his feet.

'Thank you… thank you,' panted Professor Flitwick. 'Very well, everybody, you're free to go!'

She joined her friends at the door of the hall, 'To the lake?' she asked, wanting finally to have a break.

'Bloody right!' Katie answered, pointing dramatically in that direction before walking quickly that way.

Alice smiled and followed Katie.

Susan looked at her emotionlessly. 'Shall we then?' Susan asked in a monotone voice.

'Sure...' and they began to follow the others.

'Wait up!' Mary called, running to catch up with them.

'Sorry Mary' she said, as she stopped to wait for Mary to catch up. Then they all strode off through the castle and down the lawn towards the lake.

They stopped at edge of the lake and threw themselves down on the grass. Laughing with happiness about the end of the exam, chatting amongst themselves they quickly discarded their shoes and socks.

The sunlight was dazzling on the smooth surface of the lake, and the girls sat on the bank with their shoes and socks off, cooling their feet in the water.

'How do you think you went?' Alice asked.

She groaned, 'Lets just not talk about this right now. I really don't want to go through that again.'

Katie laughed. 'My thoughts exactly! By the way, what are you girls doing for the holidays? I have the house free for the entire time.' she lowered her voice as if she were a conspirator, 'My brother is moving to the states and mum and dad are going on, what the muggles call, a 'dig'. Apparently its something to do with the uncovering of ancient materials. They use something called a shovrel.'

She laughed. 'It's a shovel Kat. Sounds like fun. I'm free to come over for a while.'

Alice nodded. 'I can't stay all holiday; Frank wants me to meet his parents, but I'll be free for some time to come over.'

Susan merely nodded, before changing the subject. 'James is trying to get your attention again.'

She sighed. 'I know.'

Alice smiled, 'I think it's cute.'

'I know' she repeated rolling her eyes.

Katie jumped up, splashing them with water. 'James loves Lily! James loves Lily!' she said loudly in a sing-song voice.

Lily sighed. 'Keep your voice down, Kat.'

Alice giggled. 'Lily loves James.'

'I do not! He's a prat. We've been through this.'

'Whatever.' Katie replied.

'Expelliarmus!' They heard shouted. She turned to look to see what was going on, noticing her friends doing the same. She turned just in time to see Severus' wand fall to the ground with a thud behind him, and hear Sirius Black let out a laugh that sounded almost like a bark.

'Impedimenta!' Sirius said, pointing his wand at Snape, who was knocked off his feet halfway through a dive towards his own fallen wand.

Students all around had turned to watch. Some of them had got to their feet and were edging nearer. Some looked apprehensive, others entertained. She got to her feet, dusting herself off, and putting her shoes and socks back on.

Snape lay panting on the ground. James and Sirius advanced on him, wands raised, James glancing over his shoulder to look at her as he went; this was obviously another attempt to attract her attention. 'Immature prat' she muttered to herself. Her friends laughed behind her.

'How'd the exam go, Snivelly?' said James.

'I was watching him, his nose was touching the parchment,' said Sirius viciously. 'There'll be great grease marks all over it, they won't be able to read a word.'

Several people watching laughed; Lily was furious that anyone could think this was funny. She began to march over, thinking it had gone far enough. The Marauders were funny enough, if only they'd stop the bullying.

Wormtail sniggered shrilly. Snape was trying to get up, but the jinx was still operating on him; he was struggling, as though bound by invisible ropes.

'You - wait,' he panted, staring up at James with an expression of purest loathing, 'you - wait!'

'Wait for what?' said Sirius coolly. 'What're you going to do, Snivelly, wipe your nose on us?'

Snape let out a scream of mixed swear words and hexes, but with his wand ten feet away nothing happened.

'Wash out your mouth,' said James coldly. 'Scourgify!'

Pink soap bubbles streamed from Snape's mouth at once; the froth was covering his lips, making him gag, choking him -

'Leave him ALONE!' she shouted at them, having finally reached them.

James and Sirius looked round. James's free hand immediately jumped to his hair.

'All right, Evans?' said James, and the tone of his voice was suddenly pleasant, deeper, more mature.

'Leave him alone,' Lily repeated. She was looking at James with every sign of great dislike. 'What's he done to you?'

'Well,' said James, appearing to deliberate the point, 'it's more the fact that he exists, if you know what I mean…'

Many of the surrounding students laughed, Sirius and Wormtail included, but Lupin, still apparently intent on his book, didn't, and nor did Lily. It was times like this when she truly hated James Potter.

'You think you're funny,' she said coldly. 'But you're just an arrogant, bullying toerag, Potter. Leave him alone.'

'I will if you go out with me, Evans,' said James quickly. 'Go on… go out with me and I'll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again.'

Behind him, the Impediment Jinx was wearing off. Snape was beginning to inch towards his fallen wand, spitting out soapsuds as he crawled. Lily watched, hoping that he'd get away whilst she was arguing with Potter.

'I wouldn't go out with you if it was a choice between you and the giant squid,' said Lily.

'Bad luck, Prongs,' said Sirius briskly, and turned back to Snape. 'OI!'

But too late; Snape had directed his wand straight at James; there was a flash of light and a gash appeared on the side of James's face, spattering his robes with blood. James whirled about: a second flash of light later, Snape was hanging upside-down in the air, his robes falling over his head to reveal skinny, pallid legs and a pair of greying underpants.

Many people in the small crowd cheered; Sirius, James and Wormtail roared with laughter.

Lily, whose furious expression had twitched for an instant as though she was going to smile, said, 'Let him down!'

'Certainly,' said James and he jerked his wand upwards; Snape fell into a crumpled heap on the ground. Disentangling himself from his robes he got quickly to his feet, wand up, but Sirius said, 'Petrificus Totalus!' and Snape kneeled over again, rigid as a board.

'LEAVE HIM ALONE!' Lily shouted. She had her own wand out now. James and Sirius eyed it warily. She wasn't going to let these _boys_ bully her best friend, even if he was drifting into a bad area (she knew it, she just wasn't ready to accept it just yet. She hoped he would see sense before she had to).

'Ah, Evans, don't make me hex you,' said James earnestly.

'Take the curse off him, then!' she thought it was a resonable request.

James sighed deeply, then turned to Snape and muttered the counter-curse.

'There you go,' he said, as Snape struggled to his feet. 'You're lucky Evans was here, Snivellus -'

'I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!'

Lily blinked. Her heart stopped. 'How could he?? After all they'd been through together!' she thought.

'Fine,' she said coolly. 'I won't bother in the future. And I'd wash your pants if I were you, Snivellus.'

'Apologise to Evans!' James roared at Snape, his wand pointed threateningly at him.

'I don't want you to make him apologise,' Lily shouted, rounding on James. Furious at him. Furious with Severus for finally bowing to peer pressure. And furious with herself for trusting that he wouldn't. 'You're as bad as he is.'

'What?' yelped James. 'I'd NEVER call you a - you-know-what!'

'Messing up your hair because you think it looks cool to look like you've just got off your broomstick, showing off with that stupid Snitch, walking down corridors and hexing anyone who annoys you just because you can - I'm surprised your broomstick can get off the ground with that fat head on it. You make me SICK.'

She turned on her heel and hurried away.

'Evans!' James shouted after her. 'Hey, EVANS!'

But she didn't look back. The tears were starting to well in her eyes.

Memories of her friendship with Severus flashed through her mind.

_'Does it make any difference being Muggle born?'  
Snape's black eyes, eager in the greenish gloom, moved over the pale face, the dark red hair.  
'No,' he said. 'It doesn't make any difference.'_

The tears started flowing down her face, as she hurried quickly to the common room, to sit on a couch there.

_'My friends don't understand why I'm friends with you.'_

_He looked nervous, worried, eyes tracing her face as if looking for something. 'Do you?'_

_She smiled. 'Of course Sev. You're my best friend; it would be pretty shocking if I didn't'_

_A large smile spread across his face. 'You're my best friend as well.'_

_She nodded. 'Friends forever'_

Hours later, or moments, she wasn't sure, she was still sitting on the couch near the fire.

'Lily?' His tentative question cut through her sobbing.

She gave a gasp. 'Leave me alone, Potter!'

"Lily... he had no right to call you that. You're not.... how dare he... you're... " he stopped trying to think of the right words.

She shook her head, hiding her tear stained eyes behind a a wall of crimson hair. "Of course he did, he was right."

If she'd thought to look up she'd have seen a flicker of pain flash across his face, but she didn't see anything until he suddenly dropped to his knees in front of her, staring through her hair with a blazing intensity that almost frightened her.

"Give me your hand" he said in a commanding, fierce tone. She was too shocked to refuse.

She felt his calloused fingers turn over her hand. He rubbed her palm for a moment then apologised "I'm sorry - in advance"

A searing pain went through her palm; she looked away from his face to glance down at her hand, to see a large fresh cut, bleeding profusely.

Her gaze flicked from her hand to his, to see it clutching a small pocket knife.

She looked back at his face in shock.

"Does that look dirty to you? It looks the same as anyone elses to me."

A pause as he looked down. She looked down to gaze at the gaping hole in her hand, not noticing that his hands were no where in veiw.

Suddenly his hand blocked her veiw; a gaping hole to match her own on his palm. He moved to his, side by side with hers. "They look the same to me"

He placed his hand upon hers, cut against cut.

"My blood is the same as your blood. You're as pure as I am - whatever that means. And I'm as pure as you are." At this she looked up to meet his eyes, to see him staring back at her; intense, unadulterated affection in his eyes.

"Never let anyone tell you otherwise. We are not our family. We are not our history. We are only this. This moment. These minds. These hearts." He increased the pressure of his hand on mine. "You are an exceptional girl, Lily Evans. Inspite of who your family is - where you came from. You're a butterfly amongst caterpillars." A pause, and he looked down. "Severus has some good in him. I know that because you could see it -because he could love you - but he had so much pain, and those so called friends of his encouraged that - and permitted his rage to consume him. It's so easy to let rage consume you. So easy to hate the world for its injustices. It takes true courage to love the world for all its beauty - to truly let love in" he reached up to push a stray hair behind her hair."You're one of life's miracles, Lily."

Tears filled her eyes, but this time from happiness.

He pulled his hand from hers, bringing his wand close with his other hand and muttered something. The edges of the cut pulled together, leaving only the whitening of a scar and a small bump. He did the same to his own, and got up to leave.

"Wait"

He stopped. "Sit please - James" he sat down next to her "I'm sorry" she didn't need to explain. "Thank you"

He smiled at her, a true smile - not the normal smirk he normally gave her. The smile she'd seen him give his friends, and wondered why she never received it, when he claimed to care about her so much. "Anytime Lily."

And they sat there, in silence, until their friends came to find them.

* * *

AN: All of Lily's friends have been used before (In my story Bound for Disaster and He's doing it again!)

I've had this story in production for a fair while now. So glad I've finally got the beginning down!

I'll update as soon as possible.

R&R


	2. Friends?

Disclaimer: I don't own anything that's recognisable. Sadly.

* * *

'Oh Lily, that's where you are! We've been looking everywhere for you!' It was Katie, walking over from the common room door, followed by the rest of Lily's friends.

She looked up. 'Yeah - I'm here.' She looked towards James, and saw him nodding. She looked back towards her friends. 'It's about time for dinner, right?'

Katie looked between her and James. 'Uh - yeah.' She seemed a little shocked.

'Lets go then' Lily got up from the couch without looking at James and started to leave.

'Wait.' James whispered quietly, grabbing her wrist as she turned away. 'Friends?' he sounded so uncertain, worried.

She nodded, almost smiling. 'Friends.' And with that she left.

The moment the common room portrait swung closed, Katie turned on her. 'What was that about?'

'What do you mean?' Lily said, feigning ignorance.

'You were sitting with Potter - after that huge fight you guys just had - after you practically told him you despised him!'

She smiled. 'Well I don't.' She paused, thoughtfully. 'He can be quite nice when there's not a crowd for him to impress.'

Katie stared at her, amazed. She was speechless.

Susan looked at her, thoughtfully. 'Glad you finally realised.'

She laughed. 'Me too.'

Alice looked at her hopefully. 'So you like him now?'

Lily stared at her, amused. 'I don't hate him. We've agreed to be friends. That doesn't automatically mean we're best buddies, or -' she paused for emphasis, knowing exactly what Alice had meant. 'Or that I'm suddenly head over heels in love with him. Doesn't work like that - kiddo.'

Alice pouted, but didn't try to push it until after dinner when they were in their dorm room.

'So does this mean you'll be hanging around with him now?' She asked Lily.

Lily sighed 'I'm not sure - we'll see.'

Alice pouted again. 'Come on Lily! Give me something to work with!'

She laughed. 'Nope. Sorry Ally-cat. No can do.'

Alice glared.

'Um, sorry to interrupt -' A small voice spoke.

Lily looked around. 'Oh - hey. What's the matter.'

It was Mary. 'It's just - Snape - he's outside the common room. He's threatening to sleep out there if you don't talk to him.'

Lily sighed, feeling frustrated all of the sudden. 'Fine, I'll be back later'

She walked down the stairs, nodding to Potter in the common room, causing his friends to look at him surprised. She almost laughed, and stopped to see what happened but then remembered what she was there for.

She walked to the portrait hole and opened the door to see Severus pacing up and down, talking to himself. When he caught sight of her, he stopped short. There was silence until-

'I'm sorry,' he said quickly.

'I'm not interested.'

'I'm sorry!' he said again, desperately.

'Save your breath. I only came out because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here.'

'I was. I would have done. I never meant to call you a mudblood it just-'

'Slipped out?' asked Lily angrily. 'It's too late. I've made excuses for you for years. None of my friends can understand why I even talk to you. You and your precious little death eater friends- you see, you don't even deny it! You don't even deny that's what you're all aiming to be! You can't wait to join you- know- who can you?' Severus opened his mouth, then closed it again.

'I can't pretend anymore,' carried on Lily. 'You've chosen your way, I've chosen mine.'

'No- listen, I didn't mean-'

'To call me mudblood? But you call everyone else of my birth mudblood, Severus, why should I be any different?'

'I- you- It's-'

'That's what I thought. Sorry, Sev - But I can't do this anymore. Goodbye' She turned around walked back inside the common room, plopping herself down onto a couch looking disgruntled.

'Alright Evans?' A male voice asked.

She looked up to see James. 'Fine' she replied with a tone of finality in her voice. 'Still on last names I see.' She added after a moment.

He smiled. 'Sorry, my mistake.' He dropped to his knees in front of the couch 'Will you forgive me, oh most gracious lady of Hogwarts. I would be ever so grateful if you would.' He made a play of the puppy dog eyes to top it off 'Please Lily?'

She paused, appearing pensive. 'We-ell' she said, drawing out the syllables to annoy him 'I guess - Since you phrased it like that - hmmm - maybe - n-yes. Ok.'

He mock glared at her. 'You just like tormenting me, don't you?'

She smiled, 'We-el - yes actually. It's highly amusing.'

He frowned 'meanie.'

'Yep!' she replied chirpily.

'That's all you have to say? You hurt my feelings, and that's all you have to say?!' His voice started rising, as he acted upset.

She frowned as if thinking. 'Um... yeah' she ended the sentence sounding almost questioningly.

'That hurts! That really hurts!' He clutched his hand to his chest 'It's like a stab to the heart, it is! You've killed me with your unkindness.' He fell dramatically sideways, pretending to be dying.

He reached his arm towards her. 'Remember... me' He choked, then looked towards where his friends were sitting watching with amusement. 'My old friends - Avenge me' and then he collapsed.

Lily had to cover her mouth with her hand to stop her laughter being obvious.

Sirius had sprung up the moment James had collapsed, and was now standing over his body. 'Farewell my friend' he said, wiping away fake tears. He looked at Lily, and glared. 'Vile woman! You killed him! VENDETTA!'

Peters eyes widened as soon as the last word was spoken and jumped up. 'VENDETTA! VENDETTA! VENDETTA!'

Remus smiled and shook his head.

Lily laughed 'You lot are all insane. Really...'

James rolled over to look at her 'You love us'

She smiled. 'Yep, that's exactly what this is.'

They all gasped and replied simultaneously 'YOU - ARE - AGREEING? - LILY - EVANS - LOVES - US?'

She started laughing so much she had to double over and clutch her stomach.

'You don't think she's still -' a voice drifted from the bottom of the stairs, stopping when the person reached the common room.

'I thought you were only talking to - him - and then coming back up.' Katie said when she saw Lily.

'I was' Lily replied.

'But -' Katie started to reply then gave up.

Lily smiled. 'I'm coming up now guys, don't worry.' And with that she stood up and brushed away some non-existent dust from her legs.

James smiled at her from his position on the seat that he'd moved to whilst the conversation was occurring.

'Feeling better now?' he asked.

She nodded. 'See you tomorrow.'

'See you!' all the boys chorused.

The girls all gave her knowing looks as they walked up the stairs to the dorms.

* * *

AN: Not sure how this chapter is; I don't have time to read through it, so I'm just hoping that there are no major problems with it. If there is I'd love for someone to mention it in a reveiw or something.

Hope you enjoyed it, I'll update as soon as possible, though I'm slightly distracted by another story idea I had yesterday. But they should both be coming out pretty soon.

R&R

- Noideagirl


	3. Getting serious?

Disclaimer: The plot is mine, Lily's friends (some of them) are mine. Nothing else is.

Lily and James have some serious conversations, leaving Lily with something to think about.

* * *

'Lily!'

She kept walking.

'Lily! Please stop! Listen to me!'

She started walking faster, hoping to reach the Great Hall as soon as possible.

'Lil-ly!

She spun around quickly 'What?!'

'You need to listen to me! Can you please -?'

'Listen to what?! I don't want your excuses or apologies. It's done!'

'But Lily - Wait!' she'd spun around to keep walking, but was stopped by a hand catching her arm.

'Is there a problem here?' Another voice interrupted.

Lily looked around to see the intruder. 'Oh thank Merlin!' she exclaimed.

The 'intruder' raised an eyebrow.

'Lily, please listen to me' the first voice pleaded.

'No, Snape' she spat out his name. 'I'm going to lunch' she wrenched her arm out of his grip, and because of the third person there, he didn't attempt to catch her arm again.

'He's still bothering you?' The intruder asked, once they'd walked out of earshot.

She sighed. 'Still. He can't take that I don't want to talk to him anymore. He just doesn't get it.'

'I can understand that.' She looked at the 'intruder' curiously. 'You kind of do that to people' the intruder continued as an explanation.

'Did I do that to you, James?' she asked, almost sounding like a little girl; curious, innocent, concerned.

A smile spread across his face. 'Only a little bit' he used his fingers to gesture a little bit, talking in a joking tone 'And only for a short period of time - two or so years - nothing big.'

She smiled, apologetically. 'Sorry'

He waved his hand dismissively. 'It's all in the past. Forget about it.'

"James...' she started, seriously.

He held up a hand to stop her. 'It's ok.' He said with finality.

She bowed her head, letting a strand of hair fall in front of her face.

His mouth twisted, almost painfully, then he smiled; albeit a slightly fake smile, but a smile nonetheless, which made her feel more at ease. They'd been avoiding anything serious, not sure that their friendship had progressed far enough for that kind of thing. 'Anyway - I heard this rumour about Slug horn - and McGonagall' He said in a conspirators tone.

She laughed heartily, and they disagreed about the likelihood all the way to lunch.

They reached the Great Hall and stopped just outside the doors. 'Lily?' James asked, nervously.

'Yes?' she asked, confused about what he could possibly be asking.

'Do you - uh - want to - um - sit with - us - for lunch?'

She looked at him, surprised.

He continued speaking, worried that she'd say no. 'Your friends could sit with us; all of you - if you want to.'

She smiled. 'I'll talk to them' she gave him a winning smile, then turned and walked into the Great Hall.

She walked quickly, and reached where her friends were in no time 'Hey guys' she said, only a hint of nervousness in her tone.

They looked up. 'Hey sugarplum!' Katie said, cheerily.

The others just nodded and said 'hi' simultaneously.

She smiled at them with affection, standing looking at them.

Katie raised her eyebrows 'Aren't you going to sit down?'

'Depends'

'On what exactly?' Katie asked suspiciously.

'Whether you guys would mind sitting with the Marauderers or not' she replied, cheekily saying it with pretend nonchalance.

'Oh really?' Katie questioned, raising her voice mockingly.

'Just answer the question with no mocking, please.'

'What question?' Susan asked, acting confused. 'You didn't ask a question.'

Lily frowned. 'Why are you all so mean to me?! Why can't we all just decide whether or not to sit with them and get it over with?'

Katie smirked. 'It's more fun this way.'

Alice and Susan nodded.

She pouted.

Alice sighed, being the only one, as always, who couldn't stand against the pout. 'Fine, we will. Right guys?' She turned to the others for confirmation.

They nodded. 'Fine' Katie said, pretending to be annoyed.

Lily smiled. 'Thanks, my dears.'

'You owe us' Katie warned, threateningly.

She smirked. 'Don't worry. I'll get you all some of my mother's death-by-chocolate cake as compensation.'

'WOO!' Katie jumped into the air. 'We wins!' she ran around in a circle, punching the air.

'Weirdo' Susan muttered, getting up gracefully. 'Thank you Lily' she added.

They walked calmly together to sit carefully next to the Marauders, the girls, apart from Lily, slightly on the edge of their seats, having been victims of the boy's pranks many times before.

Sirius smiled charmingly at them 'Don't worry ladies, you're under our protection now, we cannot, with any honour, attempt anything on you.' He almost frowned; but then his eyes lit up suddenly. 'Unless, of course, you start it, then it will be an all out war.' He turned to Katie, the victim of most of the pranks amongst the girls (and the instigator of most of the pranks against him that the girls had done). 'Keep that in mind, Stevenson'

'Whatever Black' she said, tossing her hair.

Lily saw her glance around, hopelessly for Jeremy, her boyfriend.

She sighed, and pointed to the end of the Ravenclaw table that he was sitting at.

'Thanks, Cherry' Katie whispered, before gesturing to Jeremy, who was in fact looking her way; he always was, to join her.

'Glad you could make it' James leaned over to whisper in her ear. She gave him back a small smile, still watching Katie who was watching Jeremy make his way to the table.

'Oh look, lover boy is coming over here. Everyone, get ready to vomit!' Sirius Black commented upon seeing the arrival of Jeremy.

Lily frowned. 'I don't suppose you could do something about Black?' She asked James quietly.

His lip upturned into a grin. 'I've tried. Nothing works'

Lily looked pensive. 'Why is he so annoying to her?'

James shrugged. 'Only girl who's ever pranked him back I guess.'

'That's silly.'

James laughed. 'He's a silly guy.'

'Too right!' Lily said with conviction. She stopped thinking 'Alice always swears its because he loves her'

James visibly had to stop himself from laughing.

'Yes well, Alice is the queen of romance. How is Frank by the way?'

'Quite well. He got into Auror training, so he's happy. Alice isn't.'

His lip twitched. 'I bet. How was she when she found out.'

'Livid. Crying. Well - I suppose hysterical would be the most accurate word.'

'Well that's understandable' he replied. When she raised an eyebrow at him, he continued explaining. 'She's in love. Love does crazy things to you.'

She nodded, understanding what he meant, she'd seen enough of her friends before, during, and after relationships to know. 'That's why I never want to fall in love.'

He looked at her, shocked. 'Never? Why in the name of Merlin would you -'

'I never want to be that affected by someone else. I never want my all life to be about someone who might not feel the same way.' she explained, hesitantly. She wasn't sure if she should be talking about this to him; they'd only been friends for 2 and a half weeks, she wasn't completely comfortable with him yet. But somehow, somehow she wanted to tell him.

'So you're scared?' he asked, a serious tone in his voice that she'd never heard before.

'Merlin yes! Aren't you?' she exclaimed.

He shrugged. 'I guess. But what's life without a certain amount of risk? And for something thats worth it as much as love. I would give my life to know what it felt like to be in love' he stopped looking at her intensely, before looking away and adding softly 'with someone who felt the same way.'

Her heart clenched painfully, as she realised what he was trying to say. 'James' her voice came out, low and pleading.

'Lunch has ended' he said shortly, before standing up and picking up his bag.

She watched him walk away; all the way out of the hall, before she even thought about picking up her bag and going to class.

'I'm sorry' she whispered, even though she knew he wouldn't hear. She blinked, displacing a few tears, and wondered to herself how that little revelation could affect her so much.

* * *

AN: I really didn't mean this chapter to end like this, but the second I wrote it, I just knew it was the right place to stop. I'll have to put the next section that I had worked out in the next chapter.

Thank you for all your reviews.

Planeteer-rach: Sorry you think the friendship is going too fast. I'm just writing it the way I would be with a new friend (even/especially someone I had a bad history with); I always try to be as lighthearted and joking as possible to make things less awkward. And then more serious conversations can happen later. But I probably should have thought about that fact that quite possibly very few people do that. I'll keep that in mind for later stories. I read your story (you said it was similar, and it is, which was kind of weird. But it was really good, and I hope you update soon (which reminds me, should add story to subsciption... thanks for reminding me).Thanks for the feedback!

Kiley 1 09: I'm updating! You make me super happy (squee!) by saying it's brilliant! I do try but I'm never sure what everyone else will like, so it's great to know that there's someone who seems to like all of my stories. Thanks!

appleeater123: Good to know that there weren't any huge grammatical mistakes. I went through later and found one thing that I really didn't like, change it, so I think its all fine now. Thank you for letting me know, I was getting vaguely concerned (especially since no one had said anything, I thought it really was horrible and everyone wanted to spare my feelings).

FishPonysRock: Cute is what I aim for =P, yeah, I think its pretty cute for something I randomly thought up one night when I was supposed to be going to bed because it was late and I had an early uni start the next day (why is it that the best ideas happen when you're no where near paper, or want to sleep? So not fair)

IWantAWerewolfToImprintOnMe 2: Glad to hear you think it's funny! I thought it was funny too, but I could always have been wrong =P. I'm updating as quickly as possible, I have a lot of uni homework, but I always make some time in the day to do some more writing (and this story will have my top priority now that I've finished my oneshot 'What is wrong with me' which was taking up most of my brainspace.

Hope you enjoy this chapter

R&R


	4. Abandonment

Disclaimer: I really am J. K. Rowling. And if you believe that, I have a set of uncombustable cauldrons I'd like to sell you.

AN: I'm not sure how long exam period would last, so I'm just going with the standard that we have here of approximately 2-3 weeks. Lily and James have been friends since The DADA exams, which I'm saying is the first exam. This is the last, exactly 3 weeks after the first.

I'm going to do a scene entirely about Katie in this chapter, something I wasn't planning to do, but it has become necessary for the story so I'm adding it in.

* * *

She was sitting in the Great Hall. Once again, there were more than a hundred smaller tables, all facing towards the front doors, at each of which sat a student, whose head was bent low, scribbling on a roll of parchment. The only sound she could hear was the scratching of quills and the occasional rustle as somebody adjusted their parchment.

The day was dark, unusual for summer; a dreary grey colour that made her want it to rain.

She'd finished the exam, her paper nicely titled in big letters: TRANSFIGURATION - ORDINARY WIZARDING LEVEL.

They'd done the demonstration part earlier; she thought she'd passed, just, she was just glad it was over. She'd finished her last exam, finally. She almost sighed with relief.

She wanted to turn to look at James, something she'd done for every exam that they'd had together, but he was sitting directly behind her, and she didn't want it to seem like she was cheating.

A sigh as she slumped down against the desk, making sure not to crumple her exam paper, she had to fight the urge. 'Silly' she berated herself silently, 'why does it matter?'

She found she couldn't answer that question, she just knew it was.

'OK! OK! Quills down! McKinnon! I said quills down!' A few people giggled at McGonagall's tone. 'Silence! Please as I collect your papers. And REMAIN SEATED BLACK!' she bellowed as Sirius spun in his seat and rose just a little to talk to Remus.

Again muffled laughter.

'Accio!'

The papers flew through the air and landed neatly on McGonagall's desk at the front.

'OK, you can go now' she said, almost kindly, a distinct change from her previous tone.

The hall was filled with shuffling as people gathered their things and began to leave the room.

Lily turned around, eagerly, again she didn't know why.

'Hey James'

He smiled 'hey. How do you think you went?'

A weak smile. 'As good as I could. You?'

'You'll be fine, Lil' he reassured her. She flashed him a grateful smile. 'I think I went well. Though I had problems with question 15...'

They began walking out of the room together; not waiting or looking for their friends.

If they had, they would have noticed both their groups of friends standing together a little behind them, talking in whispers.

'Oh that question!' she started, muttering under her breath.

He grinned 'Horrible, wasn't it?' A pause as he looked around, and she nodded determinedly. 'Where would you like to go?' he asked, having decided not to follow the rest of their classmates up to the common room.

'To the lake' Lily replied with certainty.

His eyebrow raised, but he said nothing.

She saw, and blushed. 'I like winter weather' she explained.

'I don't' James mumbled.

She heard. 'Oh well, we don't have to - If you want to go somewhere else'

'Don't be silly Lil' he said, 'We'll go to the lake. I always like sitting there anyway' he grinned at her, cheekily. 'Just as long as it doesn't rain.'

She shot him a look. 'I don't understand how you could not like winter weather.' she said, genuinely sounding confused.

He shuddered. 'It's just all - cold, and wet, and you have to wear heaps of clothing and that just gets wet and soggy and you have to change it.'

She sighed. 'You have no inner depth, do you?'

He looked at her questioningly.

They reached the entrance hall and began to leave the castle as she started to explain.

'Rain is the best feeling in the world. It's nice and refreshing and liberating; it has a way of erasing all the pain, worry, doubt, every troubling thought, from anyone it touches. It clears our minds and we can forget everything, maybe just have fun. It's cleansing, it's restful; your mind is free to wander to places, people, things that you normally wouldn't let it go. But that's ok, because the rain will hold your secrets for you. In the rain all the presumptions, the false personas, the decisions others make for you, wash away. Rain was the only part of life that remains untainted and pure. There is no better feeling than the rain running down your body and looking up at the grey sky. And then, when it stops raining, going inside and changing into some dry and warm clothing.' She finished her rant, almost breathless, maintaining the intense stare throughout the speech. '"Those who say sunshine brings happiness have never danced in the rain"' she quoted.

'Wow' was all James could stay, gazing at her with admiration.

There was silence for a moment, in which they both sat down near the lake, before he spoke again. 'I still think summer is better though' he said thoughtfully.

'Why?' she asked curiously.

'The feeling of the sun on your face, spreading warmth throughout your body. The way you can close your eyes and still see the brightness that infuses the day. There's more colour to summer, more intensity. The sky is clear and blue. The stillness of the trees, the soft blowing of grass, there's more - more life in summer. And the natural fragrants that occur on a hot summer night are intoxicating. There's more time in the day, time spent inside, or at the beach, with your loved ones. I've always loved summer, there's just so much more that can be done.' He finished, looking at her as if to check that she understood.

'I think I understand' she said, still half lost in her thoughts.

'And I understand about your love of rain.' He replied.

She gave a small laugh 'I guess this debate is much like the sun or moon debate I always had with my father.'

'Oh, the sun definitely.' James said, smirking at her.

'Moon' she replied quickly.

A pause, then they both laughed.

'This is nice' Lily said, after a moment, leaning back on her arms and looking at the sky.

He looked at her; eyes running over her face, curious. 'Yeah' he replied shortly.

She turned to look at him. 'I'm going to miss you over the holidays'

'And I you' he assured her.

She smiled. 'Write to me?' she asked, a little unsure.

'Of course' he replied without hesitation.

'I'll be at Katie's for at least half of the holidays, and that's vaguely near you, right?' She met his eyes, hopeful.

'Yeah' he seemed unsure of what she was getting at.

'I'll try to visit at some stage then' she said, turning back to face the sky and closing her eyes. 'If that's alright, of course.'

He stared at her, amazed. 'Of course that's alright' he managed to force the words out after a moment.

'Good' she smiled.

----

It was only 2 days into holidays and she was already missing him.

She missed his smile, their conversations, his laughter, the way he made her laugh. She missed him and it was driving her mental.

They'd only been friends for about a month; technically 3 weeks, 4 days and 12 hours, but really, who was counting?, so how could she possibly miss him so much.

She let out a sigh and decided to watch some TV to take her mind off him. She turned onto the movie Howl's movie castle.

[Howl comes running out of the bathroom, screaming. His hair is now orange]

Howl: Sophie! You, you sabotaged me! Look! Look at what you've done to my hair! Look!

Old Sophie: What a pretty color.

Howl: It's hideous! You completely ruined my magic potions in the bathroom!

Old Sophie: I just organized things, Howl. Nothing's ruined.

Howl: Wrong! Wrong! I specifically ordered you not to get carried away! [tragically] Now I'm repulsive. [slumps into a chair] I can't live like this. [starts sobbing, head in hands]

Old Sophie: Come on, it's not that bad.

[Howl's hair changes color to purple, then black]

Old Sophie: You should look at it now, its shade is even better.

Howl: [inconsolable] I give up. I see not point in living if I can't be beautiful.

She laughed. That scene sort of reminded her of James, of who she always thought he was, and how she'd always felt. She'd always felt a little like she wasn't good enough for him; not beautiful enough to be worthy of someone as beautiful as he was. And he'd always been obsessed with his hair; probably to that point that the movie went to, always running his fingers through it to make himself look hotter (and she hated to admit it, especially back then, but it really did make him more attractive).

She gave a sigh, the TV was supposed to make her forget about him, not go into an internal monolog about his attractiveness. What the Merlin in tight pantaloons was wrong with her?

She collapsed face first onto her bed, burying it there. She just wanted to sleep, pass the time until - she really didn't want to think of what she was waiting for. She closed her eyes and buried herself further into her bed sheets.

And promptly fell asleep.

She woke not too long later; maybe an hour or so, to the sound of something tapping her window. She shuffled over to the window, groggily, and opened it up. Immediately an indignant owl flew into her room, dropping a letter onto her bed, then landing on the back of her desk chair to look at her accusingly.

'Sorry' she muttered to the owl, and hurried over to open the letter.

_Dear_(he'd crossed this out) _Lily,_

_I burn, I pine, I perish._

_I've had absolutely! nothing to do as of yet, except, of course, keeping the young Mr Black in line, as he must insist on exploding things in my living room, and changing the colours of everything; including, unfortunately, all the clothing in my wardrobe, which he decided would look better in either bright pink or lime green (and I still have not discovered the counter charm so I'm wandering around looking like a fool at the moment). My parents haven't the heart (or the brains apparently) to discipline him, so it's all up to me. Dear Merlin, I'll be dead by next week. _

_Avenge me, fair maiden?_

_I hope your holidays have been well; I'm sure you're glad to see your family again. _

_Can't wait until you're visiting Katie,_

_All my thoughts (_This phrase was also crossed out, and written on a lower line was -)_  
_

_Wishing you well,_

_James._

She smiled, even after all his efforts to cross out the words he'd decided against she could still read them.

She began to reply, noticing the impatient look in the owls eyes.

_Dear James,_

_Quoting Shakespeare? How literary of you. I'm shocked, James. All I can say to that is "Redime te captum quam queas minimo."_

_I am entirely unsurprised to hear that Sirius has been wreaking havoc at your house, the only surprise is to hear that your parent's don't quell his youthful extravagances (especially if they are to ruin something of so much importance as your clothing. Merlin, the horror!). And explosions? Do I even want to know?_

_I was under the impression that it is the males duty to avenge someone when a death occurs. Maybe you could get Sirius to do it; he did seem eager the last time such an event as your death was brought up. I don't think there would be a conflict of interest (you know, since he'd be killing himself) he always seemed a little schizophrenic._

_I am quite happy to be seeing my parents again, but my interludes with my sister leave much to be desired. She must insist on calling me a "freak" every time I open my mouth to talk to her, so I have quite given her up. Alas, friends we were never meant to be. _

_I shall be seeing you anon,_

_Lily._

_P.S. You would have been more advised to write the letter on a new piece of parchment than to cross the words out. I could still read everything._

----

Katie was sitting in a park near her house. It was a week after holidays had began and she was alone, none of the girls had arrived to visit her yet. She was lonely; she hadn't wanted to tell her friends, she knew they had to spend some time with their family. But she ended up sitting alone in a park, trying to stop the empty feeling inside from the thought of being abandoned by her family. She knew they hadn't meant it; knew that they didn't even realise that it would hurt, but that was the point. They didn't know, and they didn't bother to ask.

The only reason she wasn't crying now was because Jeremy had come to visit her earlier that day. He was the only one who knew how she felt about the her brother moving away, and her parents going on an extended holiday. And he'd made the effort to come over every day. She sighed, she really didn't deserve him.

'Aw - little Stevenson is all alone. Poor little diddums' a voice came from behind her. She didn't turn around; she didn't have to, she knew that voice.

'Leave me alone Black' she snapped.

'Oh, touched a nerve there, have I?' Did your little sweetie pie abandon you?' he asked viciously.

'Don't talk about things you don't understand.' She responded quickly.

'So I'll take it that's a yes' he almost sounded amused now.

She stood up and turned around. 'No. He didn't abandon me. He wouldn't. So just sod off and leave me alone.'

'But you're so fun to rile up' he replied, smirking.

'Argh! You're just so -'

'Charming? Irresistible?' he was still smirking.

'Annoying!' she snapped back.

'You wound me' his face turned up in a sneer.

'I hate you!' Katie yelled at him.

'Ditto Stevenson' He replied apathetically.

She glared. 'Why?! What did I ever do to you?'

Black snapped. 'Because you were the only one who ever treated me like my family did. The only one I was never good enough for. "Just another Black, why should I bother giving him a chance?" You were the only one who never -'

'Flattered you? Gave into your masculine wiles?' Katie interrupted, her voice changed, questioning.

'I guess you could say that' Black mumbled.

'Do you like me?' she asked, sounding concerned.

'No' he replied, so calm and assured that no one could doubt he was telling the truth. 'It was never like that'

Katie breathed a sigh of relief. 'Black' her voice was almost tender. 'Silly boy, you should know well enough from James and Lily that you can't mess with true love. And I've always loved Jeremy. Every other man will only be a friend.'

He looked thoughtful. 'So it wasn't because you hated me - because I was a Black?' he asked, hopefully.

She gave a short laugh. 'Of course not. I only hated you for how you treated me.'

'Ha' he breathed, pensive. 'Well that serves me right.' he commented.

A laugh from Katie. 'Yep.'

'Friends?' he asked.

'Sure' she replied 'It's not like we could help it now, with Lily and James spending all their time together.'

He grinned. 'It's great isn't it? Soon -' he cackled evilly.

She grinned. 'It's excellent.'

His eyes brightened. 'Think we should help them along?'

'Definitely.'

* * *

AN: The underlined in the letter from James was intended to be the sections he had crossed out (I couldn't find a way to actually cross it out, so I just made a note in the story which I didn't want to do as I felt it ruined the flow of the piece. But alas, it was not to be.)

I just realised that I have two authors notes for this chapter. Hmm...

I'm still not sure how I feel about the Katie scene, but it actually needs to be here, and I couldn't think of a way of doing it with Lily present.

Hope you enjoyed; I've already started with the next chapter.

R&R

- Noideagirl


	5. Whipped

Disclaimer: I own Katie and Susan (which you'd think would make them listen to me, but no... they do whatever they want without my permission, never once thinking that it might entirely ruin my plans. AND Katie's getting ideas above her station and thinking she's an integral part to this story. What a foolish idea!) but anyway, anyone else is the possession of J. K. Rowling. Lucky little... *mutters under breath*

AN: I never meant to put letters in. Really. They just escaped my fingers.

* * *

She woke up in the morning feeling freezing cold. 'Damn' she muttered, when she realised she'd left the window open the night before after staring out into the night sky, thinking, pondering about deep and meaningful stuff; namely, James and how much she missed him and why.

She got up out of bed quickly, noticing in the middle of pulling on a skirt that there were two letters on her otherwise clean desk (which, must be noted, was only clean because she hadn't had the time, or motivation, to pile things onto it like she did every other holiday. She had in fact been a little distracted these holidays).

She picked them up, opening the top one quickly. She knew instinctively without even glancing at the seal; a hoof print?, who the letter was from.

_Dear Lily,_

_Do you always write your letters like you're trying to be a character from Shakespeare? Or was all that effort just for me? =P_

_My parents let Sirius get away with everything- he's the prodigal child, you might say, and it's all because they're aware of how his blood-family treated him and they're trying to make up for it. It's made him like a precocious child; a fact I'm sure you're well aware of - and please never tell him I said that._

_You're right, Sirius could be schizophrenic - never thought of that. A thought to ponder. But I concur, I think he would avenge my death; even if he was the one who caused it, strange kid._

_I'm sorry to hear about your sister - does she hate you that much? - must be jealousy on her part. Of course, this explains - in part - your reaction to the event after the DADA exam, something I know you avoid speaking of, so I'm sorry for bringing it up. (I was tempted to cross it out, but then I remembered your rejoinder, so it shall remain as is, since I'm too lazy to rewrite this.)_

_How much longer till I see your pretty face?_

_Your friend,_

_James_

She smiled at the letter, at his attempt at humour; laughing at himself and Sirius, and made a note to respond to the letter as soon as she'd read the other letter.

Upon turning the second parchment over to open it up, she noticed a wax seal with a raven pressed into it. She grinned 'Took your time, Katie' she murmured.

_Cherry,_

_I want you to come over as soon as possible (can you bear tearing yourself from darling Petunia's side?) as I am languishing, bored in the sun every day trying to find something to do. Is there nothing fun to do here? The answer, most unfortunately for me, is yes. But come, and I'm sure we'll find something to do._

_The other girls won't be coming over until they stop being all 'family' conscious and needing to spend at least a two weeks at home, with their clingy parent's and their 'darling' siblings, so we can have our tradition slumber parties. _

_Sound good to you?_

_What say you? _

_Kat._

'MUM' she yelled.

Her mum peeked her head around the corner somehow managing to be exactly where Lily needed her to be when she needed it 'yes dear?'

'Can I go to Katie's today? I'll be back again to visit occasionally during the holidays, and of course at the end.' Lily asked, anxious that her mother would say no. It was a silly fear, Lily's mum adored Katie and thought of her as another daughter, so there was the smallest chance that she'd say no.

'Of course Lil' her mother replied fondly.

'Thank you!' she exclaimed, jumping up to hug her mother.

She immediately scribbled a letter, without even sitting down.

_James,_

_I'm leaving for Katie's today, so you'll see me soon._

_Lily_

She excitedly called her owl, Piewackit, and sent it off to James.

She sat down to write a response to Katie.

_Kitty Kat,_

_I asked mum, she said yes. I'll floo there later today (I'll leave some time for you to receive this, and respond if need be._

_I am tearing myself from Petunia's side (oh woe is me) and flinging myself to yours._

_You'll have to put up with me now._

_Suffer._

_Lily._

_P.S. Isn't Jeremy keeping you company? Why are you bored if you have your 'darling' boyfriend to entertain you?_

She looked around momentarily, wondering how to send the letter to Katie when she'd sent her owl to James, and she noticed Katie's creamy white owl (Horace) seated on her windowsill.

'Hello Hor. Would you come here?'

Horace hooted in agreement and flew over to her. She attached the letter to his leg, and patted his head kindly.

'Give your mistress a peck for me, ok, Hor?' she said, smirking.

Again he hooted in agreement, then flew away.

She sat down to read Ashling by Isobelle Carmody, which was one of her favourite books. She hadn't read it since 3rd year when James had found her reading it, and mocked its title. She'd never known exactly why it was she hadn't read it after that.

She was reaching the end, and found one paragraph, a lonely two sentences, that stirred something inside her so much she wanted to cry.

_I understood that this was a moment that might never come again. I had learned the hardest way of all, that beauty and happiness, like life, were ephemeral and could no more be saved up for later than a sunbeam could be hoarded._

Almost crying, she continued reading until she came to a sentence that made her stop, literally and metaphorical. Stop and rethink her entire life.

_For a moment, doubt flickered in me, but then I banished it, for surely nothing required courage so much as love, and I was equal to it._

There was only one thought in her mind 'James'.

She blinked, gasped, blinked again, then fell backwards onto her bed and groaned.

At the same time a creamy white owl flew into her bedroom and hooted at her.

'Bring it here Hor' she said after a moment once she'd overcome the shock of thinking about James Potter in a romantic way.

The owl did as it was told.

_Lil, get your ass over here right now. I'll be waiting *taps quill threateningly* oh damn, I left little ink spots on the parchment. Ignore them._

_Come on, stop reading and come!_

_You're still reading aren't you. Well you're a little miss bookworm then. Hmpft._

_Tear yourself from Petunia, I'll put up with you for a couple of days._

_Kat._

_P.S. Of course he is, but I need FEMALE interaction too. Otherwise I'll become like that Madeline Midgeon girl who doesn't even know how to be a girl, seriously, have you ever even seen her TALK to another female. It's weird, that's what it is. But that's not what I was supposed to be saying - what was I saying? Oh nevermind, just come over. Now!_

She got up with a sigh, and ran downstairs. 'Mum' she said softly.

'Yes?' her mother looked up at her from her seat next to Petunia.

'I'm leaving for Katie's now.' she explained, still using a soft tone; she wasn't quite over the shock from before.

'Ok. We'll be seeing you later then.'

'Not later enough' Petunia mumbled. Their mother shot her a look of disgust, then looked back at Lily.

'Have fun'

'I will' Lily said cheerfully, ignoring Petunia's comment. '... I think' she added thoughtfully after she'd left the room.

She grabbed her things, and flooed to Katie's.

'LILY!' was the first thing that Lily heard when she arrived at Katie's.

She stumbled out of the fireplace and looked around for Katie.

Only to rest her eyes on Katie, Jeremy, Sirius Black and James Potter.

She gave an audible gasped.

Katie giggled. 'Surprise?' she asked, amused.

'I - what?'

Katie grinned; Lily looked around and found an identical grin on Sirius' face. She looked suspiciously between the two.

'If I didn't know how much you two hate each other I'd say you organised this. Together.'

Sirius smirked. 'Oh my dearest petal of my heart, you know us so well. But you wrong me in the accusation that I hate Katie. I, alas, have learned the errors of my way, and have accepted her as a friend.'

Katie nodded, 'Alas, it's true. You've missed a lot in the past week.'

'It happened yesterday.' Sirius interrupted.

Katie turned to glare at him. 'Must you ruin everything?'

He grinned 'ah... yeah.'

Lily smiled. 'Ah this is the Sirius and Katie I know, bickering constantly.'

Katie frowned at her. 'You have no faith.' her eyes lightened as she remembered why they were all there 'SLUMBER PARTY!' she yelled, practically destroying all of their eardrums.

Lily's jaw dropped. 'No. Katie -'

Katie pouted. 'You're no fun anymore. You USED to like slumber parties.'

Lily shook her head. 'I still like slumber parties. Just - it's always just been me and you. Why do we have to change that?'

'Because you're too set in your ways. You need help. Plus, we're mature now, and it's about time we invited some boys.'

Lily turned pleadingly to the only other sane one of the group.

'You have to persuade her out of this, please Jeremy!'

He smiled ruefully. 'No can do. There's no use trying, not when she's in this kind of mood.'

She stared at him, outraged. 'You're going to let her get away with this? Merlin, you're going to be so pussy whipped by the time you two are married.' She collapsed onto a couch. 'I'll just stay here and die and you guys can have the slumber party without me, ok?' she was staring, melancholy, at the floor.

A soft hand gently lifted hers from the couch armrest. 'Don't be silly. You'll come and enjoy yourself. Ok?'

She let his calming voice wash over her, before looking up to gaze into his hazel eyes. There was a tenderness in there which seemed to suck the breath out of her. 'Ok.' she whispered.

In the back of her mind, subconsciously she heard Sirius mutter to Katie 'She's one to talk about being whipped.'

* * *

Lady Livia: I also love Howls Moving Castle (and have been needing to watch it for the last week) which is why I added it in to the story. Plus, it kind of fit and I've always been muchly amused by that particular scene. 'I'm hideous! ARGH!' Hilarious. I too was excited to see what the two devils would do to get L and J together (I actually didn't know, Katie never does as I tell her).

planeteer-rach: Don't encourage Katie! She'll take over this story if she could. *lowers voice* but yeah, I like that scene too. I was very proud of it. The letters weren't originally part of the plan, I generally don't like correspondence through letters in other stories (only generally, I have found a few that I love) so I was trying to avoid it, but then it became necessary, and yeah.

As for the rain and the sun, that was more put in just because its an argument I always used to have with my ex, and it gave me a bit of reminiscence.

AN: I almost finished this chapter at Lily leaving her house, but decided there wasn't nearly enough interaction in it. So, the SLUMBER PARTY! (and yes, that needed to be written in Caps Lock). This has officially become the longest (word wise) LEJP story I have ever written. I'm proud of myself. Are you proud of me?

Hope you enjoyed.

Please review, I need feedback.


	6. Movies

Disclaimer: I am merely a crazy science student who spends way too much time not paying attention in Genetics.

'What the merlin in tight pantaloons are you talking about, Black?' Katie asked, perplexed.

'Did you just say "Merlin in tight pantaloons"?' Sirius asked, in shock.

'Yes' Katie replied, confused as to why that was worthy of query.

'Why?' James asked, equally as in shock as Sirius was.

'Why not?' Lily piped up, similarly as confused as Katie.

The boys were speechlessly flabbergasted.

The two girls exchanged a glance after taking in the boys' shocked expressions. They then promptly burst out laughing.

After a moment, they highfived, then Katie spoke to Lily 'What would I do without you Lil?'

Lily pretended to examine her unpolished nails as if they were the most interesting thing in the world. 'Live in a cardboard box in Victoria, Australia, eat sardines from month old tins, and use old newspapers as pillows' she said in an apathetic tone, trying to fight the grin that wanted to appear on her face.

'Oh yeah' replied Katie. 'My aunts' plan. Good times' she smiled, pensively.

For a second time, they exchanged looks after glancing at the boys faces. They yet again burst out laughing.

'They're crazy' James said, eyes wide open.

'I know' Sirius replied, still in shock. 'It's kind of hot' he added, his face now showing open admiration.

James rolled his eyes. 'Down dog boy' he said trying to keep the laughter out of his voice.

'Anyway' Katie started, back to a normal serious tone of voice. 'What were you talking about Black?'

'Huh' he said, unintelligently.

'What were you talking about? With the flobberworms? And the firecrackers? I don't remember a prank happening that involved the two of them' she explained, added after a thoughtful moment 'at the same time'

Sirius and James giggled.

The girls looked at them with raised eyebrows.

'Ah the flobberworm prank. Those Slytherins had it coming.' Sirius commented, still giggling.

'I still prefer the firecracker prank.' James retorted. 'The Professors never saw it coming.'

'Focus guys!' Katie said, waving a hand in front of thier eyes.

They continued giggling about their pranks. 'Men' she muttered to Lily.

Lily was fighting to keep the smile off her face.

'Dinner is ready!' Jeremy said, poking his head around the door. His father was a gourmet chef, so his cooking was fantastic.

Katie jumped up excitedly. 'WOW BOLOGNASE!' She quickly ran out of the room. Lily smiled at Jeremy and walk calmly after her friend.

The other two boys were still giggling.

Jeremy gave the two boys a curious look; walked over and promptly hit them over the back of the head with his hand.

They looked at him, startled.

'Dinner' he said, trying to keep from laughing.

They jumped up, exclaiming 'DINNER' simultaneously, and hurried after the girls.

Jeremy shook his head, amusedly and followed them out of the room.

'So what exactly were you planning for us to do at this slumber party?' Lily asked Katie, once they'd sat down to dinner, who was sitting next to her at dinner.

On the other side of her was James, a circumstance that both Sirius and Katie had tried very hard to promote.

'Um -' Katie looked a little lost.

'Don't tell me you left it up to the boys. Please don't tell me that.' Lily pleaded with her friend

Her friend smiled. 'Of course not. I thought we'd take a vote.' She turned quickly on James 'What do you want to do James?'

He looked a little perturbed at being the first one asked. 'Um - we could watch a movie?' his suggestion was more of a question.

Katie turned to Lily. 'What do you think?'

'A movie would be nice' she replied, smiling at James.

Sirius muttered 'whipped' under his breath, making both Katie and Jeremy attempt to kick him under the table. Both failed and kicked each other.

'OW!' The couple said simultaneously. Sirius sniggered.

James and Lily raised their eyebrows at their friends.

'What about you two?' Katie asked Jeremy and Sirius, knowing full well what their answer would be.

Sirius replied 'I think thats fine for the moment, but we'll get to some more interesting stuff later.'

Jeremy nodded, grinning with the thought.

Lily groaned at the thought of what "interesting stuff" could be.

James gave her a reasurring smile.

They finished the dinner in silence; Lily worried about later, Sirius, Katie and Jeremy excited about later, and James watching Lily concernedly.

'Well, shall we?' Lily broke the silence once they'd all finished.

Sirius and Jeremy jumped up simultaneously, then laughed at each other. Katie rolled her eyes.

'Lets go' James said calmly, holding back his laughter.

They walked to the lounge; getting ready to watch a movie. They gathered sleeping bags, snack food and other requestites for a slumber party.

'What are we going to watch?' Lily asked, after she baggeds the large couch.

Katie looked at her, smiling as if at an inside joke.

Lily grinned.

'LADY HAWKE!' They said simultaneously.

Jeremy groaned.

James and Sirius looked confused.

The girls laughed and put the movie into the tape player. They all began to find places to sit (whilst Sirius made James go back to the kitchen to fetch the Skittles).

The two boys took all the space available in veiwing range of the television, while Katie stole the only other couch available, leaving the only possible room next to Lily on the large couch.

Lily had to turn her head away from her friends to hide the blush when she realised.

James walked back in, looking around for a place to sit, after placing the skittles on the table near the tv.

His eyes wandered over Lily, who had huddled in one corner of the couch, leaving room for him.

He smiled at the look of her; huddled awkwardly, staring determinedly at the tv.

He took a seat at the other side of the couch (whilst the three others exchanged gleeful glances) and started organising himself to get comfortable. 'Pillow?' he asked, holding an extra pillow up towards her.

She shook her head, letting her hair fall in front of her face.

He paused for a second to gaze at her, then placed the pillow in the middle of the couch.

Silence.

Katie pressed play on the remote control.

The movie started.

Later, during a tense scene where a wolf falls through some ice and is drowning, Lily slowly unfolded herself from her huddled form to grab herself some chips. Her elbow knocked against James.

She mumbled an apology as they both turned red. She turned her head straight ahead to pretend to watch the movie; as Phillipe jumped into the water to save the wolf, but looked at James in the corner of her eye.

A small smile drifted over her lips.

Hours later, they were all falling asleep.

Lily had unconsciously moved closer to James, and now her head was leaning precariously close to his shoulder.

And they dreamt.

_There, right in front of me, was a figure on a horse._

_My brain asked automatically 'Will I ever be good enough?'_

_Staring at the hooded figure, a sort of awe struck me. _

_'Will I ever be good enough?' The second time I asked out loud._

_The horse bucked, to show it had heard, but the figure gave no indication of having heard._

_'Will I ever be good enough?' I asked once more. _

_This time, the figure turned their torso to face me. I was struck immediately by the beauty. It struck me, and left me dumb, speechless, breathless, hopelessly staring._

_The beauty was so much that I was not even surprised to hear the whispered word 'no' but it still broke my heart. Tears fell to the ground unnoticed as the figure turned away from me._

_I crumbled to the floor, in agonising heartbreak, with one word on my quivering lips._

_'Lily'_

He woke with a start.

AN: I'm sorry this has taken so long to update. I have had a stream of essays, exams, prac reports, practical tests and assignments, as well as helping with a play. I assure you the next one wont take as long. I'll be good, I swear!

planeteer-rach and Kiley 1 09: Glad you loved the whipped joke in the previous chapter. I was quite happy with that part as well.

R&R


	7. Muggle Blood Pact: Found out

This chapter follows directly on from the previous chapter so if you don't remember what happened, you might want to reread at least the last couple of lines.

Disclaimer: I'm sure J. K. Rowling does not write while listening to discussions about Trisome 21 and the affect of maternal age on the likelihood of translocation.

* * *

It was dark in the room; everyone had obviously gone to sleep. He saw a huddled lump on the ground near the couch and knew instinctively that it was Sirius. A little further away was a larger lump of blankets; what he guessed to be the entwined forms of Katie and Jeremy.

That left Lily.

He turned his head to look around, and noticed an odd weight on his arm. He looked down to see that Lily had fallen onto him in her sleep, and was now half on his legs and arm.

He smiled affectionately, moving a stray hair from in front of her eyes.

He shifted a little, trying to make her more comfortable, and heard what sounded like his name escape as a whisper from her lips. One of her hands reached out; clutching as if to grab something. He tried to pull the sleeping bag towards her which was only covering her knees now; but she groaned and her hand latched onto his arm.

His heart skipped a beat.

A smile drifted over her face now, as she settled back into deep sleep.

James watched her for a couple of minutes before he fell asleep again.

-------------

Katie woke with a start; the moment light reached the room. She'd always been a light sleeper.

She shifted slightly, to notice Jeremy's arm tightly holding onto her stomach.

She grinned. 'Jeremy...' she singsong whispered in his ear, making sure to breath on his neck.

'MMM?'

'Wake up love. The sun came to see you'

His eyes fluttered open. 'I love you to Pluto and back, Kat.'

'Damn right you do.' She gave him a quick peck on the lips 'Now go make me some breakfast.'

'As you wish, love' he saluted, and began to struggle out of bed.

A moment later he was gone.

'You play a good game' a voice interrupted Katie's musings.

She turned to see Sirius watching her smirking.

'What the Merlin in tight pantaloons are you on about?'

'You pretend to be annoyed and disgusted by "cutesy" couple talk, but you do it when you think no one's listening. I was surprised; I thought your disgust was for real.'

She blinked, then threw her hands up, laughing 'You caught us out. How ever so fantastic for you!'

'I could tell everyone.'

'Why?'

He shrugged. 'I could'

She shrugged. 'Big deal mister fancy pants.'

He smiled. 'You're a strange girl, you know.'

She looked shocked. 'Me? Strange? I thought I was normal! That's all I ever wanted! And now you've dashed my dreams!' she started fake crying.

He rolled his eyes. 'Give it up, girly.'

She glared at him, then promptly stood up. 'Well I don't know about you, but I have better things to do then hang around here arguing with you!'

His right eyebrow rose.

She stared at him as if he was slow. 'Breakfast!' she said as if that explained everything.

Surprisingly it did.

Sirius jumped up and, without bothering to check his clothing or hair or anything, dashed out of the room.

Katie allowed herself to smile, before catching sight of Lily and James on the couch.

'Cute' she said, before going to breakfast.

10 minutes later they headed back to the living room, to find that Lily and James were still asleep, still in the same position.

Katie shook her head. 'I'll never understand later risers.'

Jeremy grinned ruefully at her before turning to Sirius. 'I'm generally a late riser. But being around this one' he pointed to Katie and shrugged 'well... needs must when the devil drives.'

She shot him a dirty look before glancing back at the couple on the couch.

'Is that what I think it is?' Katie asked, staring at somewhere on Lily.

'What?' Sirius asked.

'That' she pointed to Lily's hand, which was lying open next to her head.

Sirius and Jeremy leaned over, curious, to stare at an old cut wound on her palm.

'I've never seen that before' Katie said, sounding annoyed at herself.

'Neither' Black said, adding after a moment 'But I've seen an identical one.'

He reached forward and flipped James' right hand over. Jeremy and Katie stared at the matching scars in shock.

'What the Merlin!' Katie exclaimed, loudly.

Jeremy and Sirius both shushed her.

Sirius bit his lip, then began to explain. 'Looks like a muggle blood pact. An ex girlfriend of mine explained the whole concept to me.' He held up his right hand, to show another matching scar. 'If you look at James' other hand, you'll see another. All of us have one. I thought it was just one' He stared down at the comparatively fresh scar on James' hand as if it had personally offended him.

'What's the matter?' Jeremy asked, a little concerned by the almost blank look in Sirius' eyes.

'I just - I guess I never really realised just how much he cares about her.' He replied, shaking his head, lost in his thoughts.

'It's that big a deal then?' Katie questioned.

Sirius nodded, pointing at the scar on James' hand. 'That - that means he would die for her.'

Katie blinked. 'Lets end this soon then' she said forcefully.

'How?'

Katie looked hesitantly at Jeremy, who nodded solumnly.

She looked back at Sirius 'Operation alone time will now be put into affect.' She looked at him curiously 'Can you think of any excuse to get you out of the house without James thinking he needs to go with you?'

Sirius bit his lip, looking pensive for a moment, then nodded. 'Yes. My uncle died recently; left me his inheritance, Merlin knows why. I can say I need to sort out the money transfer and etc.'

Katie put a hand up to her face to smother her laughter. 'Did you just actually say "E.T.C"?'

Sirius nodded, confused. 'Yeah why?'

Katie didn't respond since she was laughing too hard.

He looked at Jeremy, questioningly.

Jeremy shook his head 'long story. Aunts. A rabbit. Some kind of muggle contraption'

Sirius continued to look at Jeremy questioningly.

Jeremy waved his hand, impatiently. 'It's complicated. Even I don't properly understand!'

Sirius blinked 'Riiiigght. Oh look! The loverbirds are waking! Wakey wakey Romeo!'

'Romeo?' Katie questioned; she'd stopped laughing when she heard that James and Lily were waking. Jeremy shrugged.

'Never mind. Muggle story' Sirius said, before poking James. 'Jamesy boy' he started saying in a singsong voice 'What would your dear old mother say if she saw you sleeping with a girl, and you two not even dating. Shocking.' He ended in a scolding tone.

'Sod off dog boy' James muttered.

Sirius clutched at his heart. 'I'm mortally wounded by that comment.'

'I wish...' James said, still muttering. He began to bury his head deeper into the pillows when he suddenly felt Lily begin to stretch. He froze in position.

Lily woke to find herself staring into Sirius' eyes; her hand clutching something that felt suspiciously like James' arm, and her body draped over his. She went red immediately.

'Good morning Juliet. Have a nice... rest?' Sirius asked mockingly, not knowing that annoying only-recently-woken-up-Lily was a bad decision.

'Piss off Black, before you find your testicules stapled to your chin' she growled

He jumped back surprised, letting out a surprisingly girly 'EEK'

Once back however, he decided that he was far enough away to be out of reach of a stapler and turned to speak to James.

'Shesh man, that girl of yours is a right bitch in the morning. I'd watch that if I were you.'

With a snarl Lily launched herself across the room onto him. 'DIE BITCH!' she screamed, pummeling him with the nearest pillow.

Everyone watching were cracking up laughing.

'Desist woman! DESIST!' Sirius yelled, trying to block her attack.

After about 5 minutes Lily toppled purposefully backwards to land gracefully in a seated position; dropping the pillow and panting 'Truce?'

'Merlin yes! You're the devil!' Sirius exclaimed, having been completely pummeled for 5 minutes.

Lily took a deep breath, then sprung to her feet and calmly walked out the door, heading towards the kitchen.

James looked at the others to see them all staring at him, smirking.

'Nice work Jamesy boy' Sirius said.

'I didn't do anything' he answered

'And it worked.' Katie replied.

A pause then a loud 'HIGH FIVE!' from Sirius, who held his hand up.

The others rolled their eyes, before James reluctantly high-fived him.

Lily walked back in carry a box of cereal, eating out of the box.

They looked at her; eyebrows raised.

'What?' She asked, confused.

They hid their smirks, before shaking their heads. 'Nothing' they all said simultaneously, then proceeded to crack up laughing.

She shrugged, then asked 'What are we going to do today?'

Sirius bit his lip, looking apologetic. 'Sorry, Lily, but I have to leave. My uncle died recently, leaving me his estate, and I need to sort through all the papers and stuff.'

'Oh I'm sorry' Lily said, sounding concerned.

'For what?' Sirius asked, confused.

'Your uncles death' Lily explained.

'Oh....' Sirius started, then shrugged 'Didn't know him. He just left it to me to spite my parents.'

Lily blinked.

'Pureblood idiocy' Katie explained.

She blinked again. 'OK.' She turned to the others and asked 'What about you guys? What are we doing?'

Katie frowned 'Mum's gotten sick, so I have to take her some of her medicines and take care of her, you know how useless my father is.'

Lily turned to Jeremy.

'I'm going with her to make sure she's alright.' He said without waiting for her to ask.

She sighed and turned finally to James.

'What about you?' she asked, sounding upset.

'I'll stay.' He said, looking at her intently as if to check that she wanted him to.

She perked up a little.

'Good'

He smiled.

* * *

AN: I'm finding it increasingly hard to finish this story as many one shots are popping into my head, begging to be written.

Review and motivate me to continue writing this one instead of one shots.

Hope you enjoy this chapter; I can't wait to wirte the next one!!

Coming soon - James and Lily alone... in Katies house... What will they do?

R&R


	8. Ruined?

Disclaimer: I own Lily's friends, who are constantly disobeying my requests and doing things in this story without my permission. I own the cat who sits on my lap every time I am writing this story. I own the laptop that I write this story on. I own the house I live in. I own my thoughts. Everything else is not mine.

* * *

'Anyway guys, we're gonna head off' Katie said, pulling Jeremy along with her. She gave a subtle nod to Sirius

Sirius nodded back. 'I should probably head off too. The sooner I go, the sooner I can get it done.'

Lily and James both nodded their heads in understanding at the same time.

'See you guys later then' James said.

Sirius tipped his imaginary hat to the two staying behind, before asking 'You'll be alright then?'

Lily smiled. 'Yeah Black, don't worry. We won't kill each other when you're gone. Probably.'

Sirius poked his tongue out at her. 'See you later kids'

'Bye!' they both replied.

Another tip of his imaginary hat and he walked out the door.

Katie and Jeremy followed smiling.

'So what are we going to do?' Lily asked, hiding her nervousness from James, after the others had left.

'What do you want to do?' he answered her question with a question.

She shrugged. 'You?'

He looked at her for a moment, shrugged then said 'Well... we could go out? Have some lunch somewhere? See a movie? Or something?'

She looked at him, nervously. 'Well, I don't know about you, but I just ate breakfast so I'm not hungry. But going out for lunch somewhere would be nice later on"

He nodded quickly. 'You want to stay here until then, maybe?' he asked softly.

Her face lit up and she quickly replied. 'Sounds good. Wanna watch a movie?'

He grinned 'Sure, you can pick.'

She grinned back. 'Bad move, Mr. Potter! I could easily pick a horribly sappy romance and make you sit through it!' She responded with a teasing glint in her eye.

He shrugged; his face taken on a tender look briefly, as his eyes skimmed her face.

She blushed from the look, and turned around swiftly under the pretence of finding a movie to watch.

'How's this?' she asked, holding up a movie for him to look at.

He peered over her shoulder. 'House on Haunted Hill?' he questioned.

She smirked. 'It's a great film! It's supposed to be a horror film, but it's really just good for a laugh.'

He stared at the cover for a second, then replied 'Oh okay, if you say so...'

Her smirk widened. 'I do.'

She placed the movie in the tape player and pressed play.

About 10 minutes into the movie, James turned to Lily with an expression of outrage on his face. 'You said this was a good movie!'

She laughed 'It is James! Give it a chance.'

He frowned 'I did give it a chance. I gave it 10 minutes of a chance! And it failed to deliver!'

Lily pouted. 'It's a great film. You just obviously have no taste' she poked her tongue out.

He gasped. 'I have no taste?! Me?! This coming from the girl who thinks this' He pointed at the television screen 'Is a good film.'

She pouted again. 'Meanie' she replied, hitting him with a pillow.

He gaped. 'You just hit me with a pillow!'

She smirked. 'Yes. Yes I did.' She looked at him tauntingly 'What ya gonna do about it?'

His eyes narrowed, as he picked up a pillow and promptly hit her in the stomach with it.

She laughed for a second, then screamed 'PILLOW FIGHT!' before slamming her pillow down onto his head.

At the same time he whacked his pillow onto her shoulder.

An instant later they both stepped back to look at each other.

And then simultaneously shouted 'ATTACK!' and ran at each other pillows raised.

They hit each other full on and toppled over; Lily falling backwards with James narrowly missing falling onto her.

There was a moment of silence.

Then, as if on cue, the two of them proceeded to laugh hysterically.

'Oh - Merlin -' Lily gasped between laughs.

'That - was - epic -' replied James, also through laughter.

After a minute, their laughter slowed, but the smiles on their faces remained.

James rolled over slightly so he was on his side; looking at Lily.

Lily smiled more from the action and rolled the opposite way to face him.

'We have perfect timing, hey?' James said.

She nodded, still smiling, her eyes meeting his. With a jolt of an indescribable emotion, she realised just how close they were to each other.

Her whole body flushed with heat, and she lowered her eyes to gaze at his shoulders.

'Lily' he dragged out the syllables, raising his free hand to touch the bottom of her chin.

She raised her eyes to meet his, and saw something strange in his eyes.

Her breath hitched.

'James' she wasn't sure if it was a question or a statement.

His face moved infinitesimally closer to hers, then he stopped.

He bit his lip as if confused about something, then started to lift himself off the floor.

Her eyes widened with disbelief as he moved away from her, and a feeling of something snapping inside her stopped her from doing anything.

Suddenly she felt like crying.

She stood quickly, brushing herself off as if she were covered in dust. 'I'm going to the bathroom' she said curtly, before walking towards the door.

'Lily!' James called after her, sounding shocked; pleading.

She didn't listen as she strode out the door.

A few steps later, she was inside the bathroom, locking the door, and collapsing to the ground. A sob escaped her lips as tears began to trail down her cheeks.

'Bollocks' she whispered, through her tears and sobs. 'I sodding love bloody James Potter.'

* * *

He watched Lily walk through the doorway, completely ignoring his call.

A pang of regret shot through his body, and he wanted nothing more than to follow her, stop her in her tracks and kiss her senseless.

But if there was one thing he'd learnt in his years with Lily, it was that you never stopped her when she was upset.

And for once in his life he wanted to do the right thing.

All he wished was that he'd taken the leap and kissed her when the opportunity was there, but their friendship was going so well, and he hadn't wanted to ruin anything.

He sighed. "Seems like I've done that anyway" he thought to himself.

He slumped onto the couch, noticing for the first time that the movie was still playing.

'Why do I always ruin things with Lily?' he asked, feeling hopeless. 'I just wish I didn't love her so much. I wouldn't hurt as much when she runs away from me then.'

He buried his head in his hands. 'I wish I could just tell her.'

* * *

lundigurrl: Glad you like my story, I'm trying to keep up the good work. Remus and Peter are not around yet. James and Sirius are only there because they live nearby (well, James' parents house is, and Sirius lives with James). Remus and Peter will be coming back into the story very soon.

Wolfgirlxoxo: Thanks for the review, it's always nice to hear that I'm doing something right =) Here's an update for you.

I know it's a short one, but I couldn't work out a way to continue it without making it huge. And I wanted to post an update as soon as possible

Anyway, enjoy!


	9. Finale

AN: so this took ridiculously long to complete, but uni's been a bitch and I haven't had time or inspiration. However, finally, COMPLETE! It only took 2 years... EEK!

Anyway, enjoy the conclusion. I did.

* * *

It was almost dusk when Katie and Jeremy arrived back at Katies house. And they arrived to find a silent house.

'Lily?' Katie called out. When there was no reply, she paused, then 'James?'

They walked into the living room, where they'd been watching movies earlier. James was huddled, with his face still buried in his hands.

'James?' Katie said softly 'What happened?'

There was no answer.

'James?' She tried again.

Still no response.

Katie turned to Jeremy. 'Keep an eye on him, I'm going to find Lily.'

Jeremy nodded.

Katie searched the house, until finally, 15 minutes later, she discovered that the bathroom door was locked, with the sound of muffled sobs escaping.

'Lily, it's Katie. What's the matter sugarplum?' she asked softly through the door.

There was no response from Lily either, except an increase in sobbing.

'Bollocks' Katie muttered.

She leaned her head momentarily against the door, before heading back to the living room.

'Anything?' She asked Jeremy when she arrived.

He shook his head.

She started chewing her lip, nervously. 'What can we do?'

A sound of a crack startled the couple.

'Merlin! It's as quiet in a grave here!' Sirius' voice boomed from the kitchen.

Remus' quiet voice responded. 'I know what you mean, where is everyone?'

'We're in here!' Katie yelled.

Sirius and Remus promptly walked into the room, followed by Peter.

Sirius immediately noticed James' frozen position. He strode over. 'What the Merlin has happened? Prongs?'

At the sound of his nickname, James lifted his face from his hands, and gazed at Sirius with an expressionless face. 'I messed up Padfoot. I messed up. I don't know what to do now.' His eyes lowered. 'She hates me.'

Sirius grabbed hold of James' shoulders and shook him. 'Don't say that! Tell us what happened. We can fix this.'

A single tear slid down James' expressionless face. 'I had the chance. THE chance. I didn't take it. She hates me. She's been in there since 10. 10 Padfoot! She won't talk to me.'

Katie marched over. 'THE chance?' She demanded.

'To kiss her.' James replied, eyes downcast.

Her eyes widened. 'Why didn't you?'

He didn't respond.

Remus walked up beside Katie. 'I think I know that.'

She looked at him questioningly.

'He wouldn't want to destroy the friendship.' He shrugged.

Katie rolled her eyes, and threw up her hands. 'Boys! I give up on you all.'

Jeremy smirked. 'All of us?'

Her expression softened. 'Ok, not all, but...' her expression turned hard again. 'I'm going to fix this.'

She marched to the bathroom, pausing only briefly to mutter 'Alohomora' with her wand pointed at the door, before striding through the bathroom door.

Lily was sitting on the ground, huddled in a ball sobbing, but she glanced up when the door swung open.

'Leave me alone' she whined softly.

Katie shook her head furiously. 'I'm afraid I can't do that Lil's. Talk to me' she responded in a business-like manner.

'He doesn't want me.' Lily sobbed. 'And that shouldn't matter, but for some reason it does. It hurts... It hurts SO much.' Her face was scrunched up as if in pain, her eyes red from crying, and tears still leaking out. 'I don't think I've ever cried this much! Not even when Tuney disowned me, or Sev betrayed me.' She sobbed uncontrollably for a moment. 'Why does it hurt so much?'

Katie took her into her arms. 'Because you love him, Lily. And, before you wallow in despair, he loves you.' She pulled back for a moment to look Lily in the eyes. 'He always has, sillybilly, so why don't you dry your eyes, go find him, tell him how you feel and live happily ever after.'

Lily shook her head. 'He doesn't. Why would he have rejected me if he did?'

Katie gave a soft sigh and leaned her forehead against Lily's. 'Because he was worried about you rejecting him.' She shook her head and stood up. 'Honestly, the two of you are hopeless. Lovestruck fools.' She gave a small smile. 'Not that I'm one to talk.' She reached her hand out to Lily. 'Come on, lets get you cleaned up.'

Lily took her hand, and gave a soft chuckle. 'I must look like a mess.'

Katie smiled. 'I'm sure James would still think you look beautiful.'

Lily managed a smile.

They took a few moments to clean Lily up before walking back to the living room, Katie ahead of Lily.

They walked into the living room, to be greeted with a sight of all the Marauders in a circle expanded slightly to include Jeremy. The circle dispersed at their entrance.

Remus came to greet Lily.

She smiled at him. 'Remus.' He gave her a hug long enough to allow him to whisper in her ear. 'Go for it, Lily.' She blushed slightly

Peter came forward next for a hug 'Good luck. Not that you'll need it.' Her blush deepened.

Sirius bounded over. 'My dear Lily, make me proud!' He said, loud enough for the whole room to hear.

She was blushing as red as her hair now.

The three boys, plus Jeremy and Katie waltzed from the room.

James was blushing as well, his head lowered to hide it. 'Damn meddlesome...' he muttered.

She took a step forward. 'It's alright, James.' She tried to meet his eyes. When she failed, she settled for looking at his collar. 'I'm sorry for overreacting.'

He started, and strode forward to grip her shoulders. 'Lily. You didn't overreact.'

She resolutely stared at his collar, now refusing to meet his eyes. 'No?' she asked, her voice suddenly devoid of hope.

His mouth twitched painfully. 'I imagine I would have done the same actually.'

Her eyes flicked up to his. 'What?'

His gaze flicked between hers and her mouth. 'I imagine if you rejected a kiss from me, I'd be devastated.'

Her breath caught. She found herself breathing heavily, feeling her whole body quivering in anticipation for a kiss. 'James' she murmered.

He fixed his gaze on her eyes, as if trying to read something in them. 'You won't reject me, will you?'

She felt a word escape her lips, but even at the time couldn't be sure if it was 'No' or 'James' or perhaps both.

The next thing she knew was the feeling of his soft lips covering hers so gently it was if she was imagining it. Her hands jumped up, one to his chest, one wrapped around his waist, gripping his jumper tightly in her fists. He pulled her closer with his arms, hugging her against his body. The kiss deepened, lips moving against lips in a desperate passion that left them both breathless. 'Lily' he murmered into the kiss. She groaned, trying to pull him closer.

He pulled away with difficulty, breathing heavily. His forehead leant against hers.

'I love you, Lily.' He said, voice thick with emotion. 'Never leave me.' His eyes burned.

'Never' she responded, her voice breathless and just as filled with emotion. 'I love you too.'

Immediately, they heard cheering from the door. They turned instinctively around to see Sirius leaning through the door and Remus and Peter trying to pull him back.

The couple laughed.

ff

Two days later.

The group were sitting in the kitchen watching Jeremy cook. Katie was chatting to Sirius about a Quidditch game that had happened the day before, Lily and James were sitting next to each other on bar stools with James' arms around Lily and Remus and Peter were playing Exploding Snap on a small table in the corner. The sound of some of Remus' cards exploding covered the sound of a crack.

The next moment, Susan, Mary and Alice were standing in the kitchen. They looked around the room in confusion.

Alice was the first to speak. 'What the Merlin has happened in the last week?'

The room broke out into laughter.

* * *

So there it is. Finished at last. Wow...

All my love out to the people who stuck with me, to the people who reviewed, especially those who reviewed more than once. I love you guys.

Noideagirl.


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